when?

pic

the dust that came off the cover of your favorite book,
the unused pens and notepads that you once thought were pretty,
the notification from the app that reminds you to catch up with that series that always made you laugh,
and all the countless thoughts that had been confined inside your head—
they are all craving for freedom; waiting to be released from your suffocating space;
longing for you to need them, again.

what it’s like to break

let me break it to you:
silence means breaking
perhaps dismantling a more void you
and it feels like it’s crippling
all your bones
all your hopes
and it’s suffocating
while it’s enabling
the dead nightmares inside you
to swallow your nerves
while it’s disabling
you to smile and function
but
let me break it to you:
moon is silent
but neither broken
nor suffocated
stars are made to warm
the skies and eyes
perhaps they’re dismantling you
and enabling you
to see how that void can be
something so painful and purposeful
that you
won’t even have to run anymore.

what it’s like to fall asleep

i took a rest
as i felt of losing the desire
the eagerness
to spill or to expose
whatever fills the void
whatever cements the shattered spots
whatever breaks the peace
whatever hushes the blaring sounds

all in my head—
a never-ending cycle
a painful encounter
that will never go away

so i took a rest
as i felt of losing the fire
to overcome the freezing
and the numbing point

have i ever exposed it
or just absorbed all of it?

that’s why i took a rest—
and attempted to arrest
the culprit that has been
destroying the solitude:
my mind?

it’s a never-ending cycle.